How to Let Go of Fear in Your Life

Edited Thumbnail Art By: Cold Tommy Gin

Do you have fears in your life? Would you like to live your life without fear? In this video ( ) I am going discuss how you can let go of fear in your life.

This script is Based on Part 7 of the Video Series by Tom Campbell called, “My Big Toe”. This script is an edited version of the transcript from that video. Tom Campbell is a physicist, lecturer, and author of the My Big T.O.E. trilogy.

The first thing I want to discuss is beliefs and how they are related to fear. When I'm talking about beliefs and fears, I don't mean in the intellect. It's not that you shouldn't be afraid of ghost. It's not that kind of fear that I'm talking about, well its all fear, but the fear that I'm talking about is that you might be afraid of not being accepted or people won’t like you; you might fear not being loved. You might have fears of saying the wrong thing; having people think you're silly. You might be afraid of a being ostracized. Maybe you are afraid that people might think you haven't succeeded in life, etc. You may have fears that the bad guys are going to overrun your or whatever. Not just personal fears, but you know the enemy, whoever they are, they're always out there plotting against you. Like your boss and your coworkers. They don't appreciate the work that you do and it goes on and on. All of this stuff is fear and fear then creates ego because when you're afraid it's about you. My wife doesn't do the things I need for her to do for me. And my children; I worry about them doing drugs and getting into trouble or getting hurt. So everything is about you. It's not really about them. Even when you tell yourself that it's about them, it's mostly not about them. It's mostly about how you're disappointed in the stuff they do, how you don't like the way things are going, how you are fearful for them. So if we see all these things and we realize it is just fear, we humans are living in fear all the time. It's not just the Religion and politics; the country beating the war drums. Fear, fear, fear. There's a boogie man or a terrorist behind every bush. You see we have all that going on in our lives.

So now, most of television we watch is all about fear and violence. The news is all about fear and violence. It is really difficult to live in this society without being all about fear and violence. We are just saturated in it all the time. Humans live with fear everywhere and the first thing to do is realize that that you are living in fear; then you can let go of that fear. That's easy to say and very hard to do, particularly if it's a personal fear of yours, but there's only one antidote that I know of for fear and that's courage. You have to get to the point where you can accept whatever. In other words, if you can think of the very worst thing that can happen and then accept it, well, if that happens, I'll deal with it. I'll deal with it with love and caring and do the very best I can and I'll turn it into a growing situation. Well then what's there to be afraid of? You've already accepted the worst. If you've accepted the worst, there shouldn't be anything else to worry about. Now then, if you are just doing this intellectually, it won't have any effect. You have to do it at the being level. That is the thing; all of us humans must change our intent at the being level to where it's not always about us but It's about other, so we must make other what is significant in our lives, what can we do for somebody else? It is not always about what we can get from other humans. It is not just about me, me, me. It's a difference in perspective. It's another way to approach things.

So now you may say, I work in this busy job and I don't have time to meditate and be spiritual and I don't have time to help out the community. You don't have to change your life like going into a cave someplace and putting on a robe and meditating for the next five years in solitary confinement. This is not going to help you very much. Most of what you have to learn is right there in front of you. It's all there. You just have to do it. You have to grab the opportunity. Everything you do, every little intent, every time you interact with somebody, every good morning or goodbye or smile; all these little things are all choices you get to make. If somebody is rude to you, you have a choice. You can be rude back or perhaps you can threaten them, you can even hit them. You can walk away angry, you can do all sorts of things. You can stew over it or you can let it go. Or maybe ask yourself, “If they're acting like that, they must be in pain. They must be having problems; maybe I can help them out.” You can have that kind of attitude. So you have thousands of little tiny decisions every day in your interactions with people and in your thoughts that can help express a higher-quality consciousness of yourself. When I'm fussing or arguing or doing something, this isn't about me. It's about me being right. It's about me being smart or me having to answer. Hey everybody listen to me. Or are you really listening to them and finding out what can you do to help rather than thinking, “if everybody would just do what I say, everything would be OK.” It's a different approach, a different kind of attitude.

A way to grow spiritually and help you deal with fear is to try to give as much as you can give rather than get as much as you can get. It's about others. It's about what you can do to help somebody else. If you do this, you will grow. You will evolve as you focus on others. If you are always focused on yourself, say, all right, I need all of my time for myself. This is about me now. I'm going to grow. I'm going to grow spiritually, and it's all about you. You won't grow very much. That's not going to take you very far because that's all just you interacting with yourself. You can get a little bit from that. Think of the monk that goes into the cave and stays there for five years. It's not that he can't grow spiritually; it's just that he grows in a very lopsided way. Some things he learns very much. He learns patients. He learns meditation techniques. He may spend time out in the larger reality, but then take that same man, take him out of his cave at the end of his five years and drop him on the street corner in New York. He'll be aggravated. He'll be upset. His ego will roar up ahead of him because these people are rude. There's noise, there's traffic. He can't deal with it. You see that's a problem. You need to be able to deal with these things. It's not like you put yourself in a very protected environment and then you feel like your master because you do so well and nothing ever trips your ego in that environment, right? But you need to be able to be like that everywhere. You need to be able to be like that when that guy cuts you off in the car and runs you off the side of the road, instead of going into rage, you need to just deal with it and deal with it gracefully.

The last thing I want to talk about to help you let go of fear in your life is the idea that you are not always in control. Most of you think you are in control. Most of us think we control something. We control a certain parts of our life. You know that we're kind of in control. At work we are the boss and maybe we control things and you're actually not in control of anything important. The only thing you really can control is yourself. Everything else you can perhaps bully in the short term to get them to do it the way you want, but you're not really in control of much at all. So let control go. You don't need to be in control. The best thing to do is to deal with whatever happens to you with love and with caring and whatever happens to you, it isn't really so important. So it's not that you have to arrange your life to be the way you'd like it, but let it happen however it happens. Let go of control. Let your life unfold in front of you and deal with it, deal with it with love and caring and make everything that you interact with a lesson. Let everybody you meet be the teacher that you can learn from. 

So these are some of the attitudes that'll help you deal with and let go of fear. You just need to have the courage to say, well, OK, this frightens me. I'm really frightened about my children. I'm really frightened about this and that. I am frightened that my mother in law may come live with me. I'm really frightened about politics and war. You're frightened about all these terrible things that might happen. Just let it go. It is how it is. You're not in charge, you don't control it, just accept it as it is and deal with it. Not by ranting and raving about it not being the way you want it, but deal with it by caring, learning, and growing from it. So that's the thing. Look at your life. Find your fears. I know you think you have hardly any fears, you know that's not true. Find your fears, examine them, realize they are just fears, and then have the courage to except that. Go on. Stop worrying about what might happen next. That's awful. Just accept whatever happens. Look at it as; I see an opportunity to grow. Everything's an opportunity. It's all fun and you'll find then your life becomes joyous. Things don't upset you. Things are OK. You just deal with it. It's almost like, all right, give me another challenge. I'm ready. You know whatever happens next, this is fun. Have that kind of attitude towards your life rather then this is going to happen and I can't control it, and that's upsetting. So that's the key thing; dealing with fear and letting it go so that we become love. Let go of the fear. Let go of the ego and become love.

Tom Campbell - My Big TOE - Part 7 -